By Peter Omondi

A CHINESE CORPORATION — You have two cows. You have 300 people milking
them. You claim full employment, high bovine productivity, and arrest the
newsman who reported the numbers.

AN ARKANSAS CORPORATION — You have two cows. That one on the left is
kinda cute.

ENRON CORPORATION — You have two cows. You sell three of them to your
publicly listed company, using letters of credit opened by your
brother-in-law at the bank, then execute a debt/equity swap with an
associated general offer so that you get all four cows back, with a tax
exemption for five cows. The milk rights of the six cows are transferred via
an intermediary to a Cayman Island company secretly owned by the majority
shareholder who sells the rights to all seven cows back to your listed
company. The annual report says the company owns eight cows, with an option
on one more. Sell one cow to buy a new president of the United States,
leaving you with nine cows. No balance sheet provided with the release. The
public buys your bull.

ARTHUR ANDERSON, LLC — You have 2 cows. You shred all documents that
Enron has any cows, take 2 cows from Enron for payment for consulting the
cows, and attest that Enron has 9 cows.