— On Mon, 8/4/08, felix okatch wrote:
From: felix okatch
Subject: Fw: DUOKO MON EI RIA
Date: Monday, August 4, 2008, 3:19 AM
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WIDOWS APPEAL TO ELDERS TO END BIASED CULTURAL PRACTICES OF ‘WIFE INHERITANCE’
First of all according to Luo customs, ‘Jater’ a levir, a man who takes a widow in a leviratic customs has no right to anything except for food and accommodation for the day and time. ‘Jater’ has no prescriptive right, cannot be allocated anything except temporary usufruct.
But it is upon the widow to let it go farther if she wishes but she is not encouraged to do so after ‘Jater’ has appeared. Note that according to Luo customs even a widow of 80 years goes through this ritual. It is not sex as some press has put it over the years.
One asks as to why is this custom so and why can it not be discarded? It is an activity which involves two parties like marriage and you cannot just get rid of it over night.
Luos, both men and women are superstitious and fearful people. They believe in the ghost of the dead that would hound them in future if they fail to do some rituals. They also believe that the elders by birth control the magic and ghost of ancestors. This power of the elder is still vested in the quasi-religious-magical beliefs of the people. In other words the principle of being first born, i.e. primogeniture is inherent in Luo culture.
In this marital circumstance therefore, it is erroneous to look at one cultural practice and judge the whole. Culture is all around us and it is never a one event or activity. For example, for all human beings, marriage is one of the most important metamorphoses in life. It also generates more problems and joy as well. Problems are mainly due to ignorance of man and woman.
As for Luos, marriage has a host of many rituals and cultural practices that one cannot ignore and come up with one prescriptive phrase that ‘leave the widows alone…………..’ For Luos widows are part of a home. This is why among the Luos, there is no word called, divorce.
This is evidenced by Luos burying their deceased wives whom they were not cohabiting at time of death. For Luos, according to the customs, marriage is for eternity.
Now on widow care which you erroneously term as ‘wife inheritance’, the purpose is not to inherit but be on stand by for cultural fulfillment. The purpose is to take care and perpetuate the lineage of the deceased husband. The ghost of the dead ensures continuity. Also take note that there is nothing like mandatory sex unless the widow voluntarily consents to it. It symbolizes care as that done for a woman of 80 years. However if the ladies want to go the sexual way, no one discourages it. Particularly if she is young and needs more children to extend the lineage of her late husband. When this spreads AIDS and STD is upon the two like in any normal human activity.
Cultures change over time. Just as Luos have abandoned the practice of removing six lower teeth, they did not need foreign press to tell them to stop. The same can be said of male/female mutilation which is not a cultural practice among Luos. Luo customs are good and bond the community together if followed and applied respectfully in the changing environment and times
Felix Owaga Okatch
Wuod Gem Nyawara
e-mail: felixokatch@yahoo.com
Tel: 254-721-735489
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From: felix okatch
Sent: 04 August 2008 13:24
Subject: Fw: DUOKO MON EI RIA
Dear All,
What do you say?
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Felix Okatch
– On Tue, 8/5/08, Carol Ogana wrote:
From: Carol Ogana
Subject: RE: DUOKO MON EI RIA
Date: Tuesday, August 5, 2008, 2:32 AM
Ya ya I hear you Mr. Okatch !!! Now tell that to the rest of the villagers who have no access to this facility !!!!!!!!!
P/s Kwani uli quit RAMOGI radio ?????
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— On Tue, 8/5/08, felix okatch wrote:
From: felix okatch
Subject: Fw: RE: DUOKO MON EI RIA
Date: Tuesday, August 5, 2008, 4:48 AM
John,
Please share with MakOwiti and those talkers who pretend they are conversant with Luo customs.
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Date: Tue, 5 Aug 2008 05:38:39 -0700 (PDT)
From: felix okatch
Subject: DUOKO MON EI RIA/ WIDOW INHERITANCE by Felix Okatch
Thanks alot for this info, but my concern is that there are many women/widows who actively advocate for an end to the TER issue. They are young and sexually active, after they’ve been left alone to life without any body responsible or someone known to the community to be taking care of them they will engage in sexual activity with other people in secrecy. Isn’t this practice more dagerous than officially getting involved with JATER?
Well spoken Mr. Okatch!
JR ALILA
Fellow Elders,
The AIDS plague and modern activism by interested parties have mudied the waters to the extent that the good old cultural sense has left our homes—gone with the dead, and in its place apathy has settled and spread its roots.
We can debate the pros-and-cons of widow inheritance and still come to the conclusion that it made sense and still makes sense today, but only if the widow is healthy (and her new suitor is healthy) and is not another victim of the disease.
By the same token, any marriage within AIDS-striken communities only makes sense if both partners are not themselves AIDS victims.
I am talking about openness, to the extent that carriers are free to announce that they are carriers without risking losing their jobs or being isolated. I am talking about cheap-and-universal testing!
As I bemourn the situation in the novel SUNSET ON POLYGAMY, marriage is about life and not just sex. But since babies are normally made through sex, and AIDS is mostly aquired through sex, AIDS threatens life as we know it (unless we are into test-tube babies). AIDS therefore threatens any form of marriage including polygamy and widow inheritance (unless the marriage is sexless as Mr. Okatch puts it). When polygamy, widow inheritance and lose morals are compounded with AIDS, marriage becomes a death trap as we already have known.
Life would be very simple for practising LUOS if Mr. Okatch’s spiritual prescription were enforcible. What a widow would need is a paid “Jakowiny” to spend an actionless night in her hut, and walk away with the unsettled spirits of her husband. But how many Jo Otong’ like that—who are willing to be the “Levitical Goats—are there?”
In the current climate, iff a woman insists that she can’t re-marry, let her be; don’t throw your son, brother or grandson at her for any spiritual or social-engineering reason. You could be giving him a death sentence!
thanks for the information but i think that when a mama chills to jater then let her not bring Mbegu Mbaya home fo I think that this ter thing was guiding our young widows to graze within the home and if need be , in case she needs to continue having some offsprings ,then she was to have them with the family of the diseased to kik okik kodhi
DEAR ALL,
AIDS IS CAUSED BY UNSAFE SEX. SEX BY ITSELF IF SAFE DOES NOT CAUSE AIDS. THERE SEEMS TO BE AN IMPRESSION CREATED BY ANTI-LUO PRESS OVER THE YEARS THAT ANY WIDOW INHERITANCE MEANS UNSAFE SEX. IT SEEMS TO MAKE LOUD NOISE THAT SEX IS BAD. NO NO NO. SEX IS ONE OF THE BEST HUMAN ACTIVITY FOR PROCREATION AND REPRODUCTION MORE SO IF IT IS NATURAL AND BY CONSENT OF THE PARTIES INVOLVED. WHAT OUR PEOPLE NEED IS MORE TALKS, COOMUNICATION, GOOD ADVICE AND ENHANCEMENT OF GOOD LUO CULTURE.
FELIX OWAGA OKATCH
wuod Gem Nyawara
Dear Felix
I am greatful for the way you tuckled the toipc.Yes, it is true that some communities whose so called “cultures” are no where to be seen.Theyo use certain newspapers they own to ridicule/propagate falsehoods. Historical ignorance and arrogance is the greatest game they have used ever!
Long leave lalenjin, maasai and luo culture which keep us more humane!
RE: OKATCH’ARTICLE
It is timely and wise enough that luo community totally abandoned retrogressive and archaic cultural practices that have only seen our communities move back to pre-colonial times.
We have to be vocal on socio-economic development and live within demands of our era: HIV/AIDS, Maize Shortage, Political Manipulations and intertwined and choreographed poverty affecting luo Nyanza.
We can move on with unity to change what we dont want and to adopt what is important for us now.
Thanks.
but there is overwhelming evidence that sexual acts are inevitably done. what do have to say about the precusory acts like widow cleansing.? don`t you think if we are all equal as per human rights, women can take care of themselves; how about the right to self determination?
Thank you Mr. Okatch. I concur with your analytical sense and approach to this cultural matters. I iNVITE YOU TO JOIN ME in another campaign for cultural ammendments over certain chains that have arrested us since time immemorial.
Mr Okatch,
This quite enlightening, more people in luo community should be empowered with such info to make them understand that certain cultural beliefs are outdated and should be thrown into the bins.
A widow should be given the freedom to choose how to live her sexual life,if she can live without a partner,that must be respected.
They have a right to practise sex without being judged,as long as they practise safe sex to curb spread of STI’s.
This is good work that should not be hidden or sat on.
Logical discourse would arrive at this conclusion. There is nothing untoward about care of widows. Those speaking about ‘ter’ in negative totality are either not bound by this custom or are wanting away to replace it with culture/customs of other people. What is needed is to address these issues with the sobriety demanded.