From: Juma Mzuri
An unhappy marriage can take a toll on your mind, body and soul.
From casual observation, regarding marriages of family members, friends and co-workers, I’ve noticed the majority are unhappy. The happy couples were in the minority.
The wives’ and husbands’ unhappiness shows in their faces. Both tend to look older than they are, beaten down, stressed out, bitter, angry and depressed. A few have even turned to alcohol, pills and extramarital affairs. They also have various health problems like ulcers, obesity, hypertension and migraines. Some are unusually harsh with their children. Others are emotionally and physically abusive toward each other. Overall, both husbands and wives have somehow lost their zest for life. They are mere shadows of their former selves – unlike the happy couples they were on their wedding day.
In some cases, the marriages became so unbearable – the wives packed up themselves and their kids, left, filed for divorce and went on to forge new lives.
Yet, some women criticized the wives for leaving, accused them of being selfish, for breaking up their marriages and reminded them that “God hates divorce.”
In other cases, the marriages became so unbearable – the husbands packed up themselves, and sometimes, the kids, filed for divorce and went on to forge new lives.
However, some men praised the husbands for leaving, didn’t accuse them of being selfish, for breaking up their marriages and didn’t remind the husbands that “God hates divorce.” Some family members and friends even congratulated the husbands for leaving such greedy, selfish, ungrateful b*****s, even when the wives didn’t deserve such a label.
Why the double standard?
There is no stigma, maybe just your opinion which you are entitled to.
Unless you mean , why does inequality,sexism, ageism,rape and abuse stitll exist in our modern society today then I’m sure you know the answer to that.
I take it you are writing this from a place calling itself democratic and civilised.
Believe me when I write about certain individuals in the society who believe
that females are unworthy, below standard, should be forced to have intercourse, should be
abused, have no rights and so on.
I am a luo female and I’ve been married twice and twice divorced.
This is normal and I ain’t one bit ashamed. You know why? coz I’m just as human as everyone: including you.
You too are human and deserve the best just like my brothers.
People should do away with marriages that don’t work.
Wether they are men or women. They should honour their responsibility to their kids and that should be it!
These sort of problems are all over the world but mainly people from our luo tribe are the ones who still think women are below standard. Other communities have issues like these but there women dump men and families who abuse their marriages. A luo woman in kenya today is considerd backward coz they entertain bigots.
If you are reading this, ensure your sister and mother are safe and happy where they are and if want to divorce their abusive, sexist,ageist,full of STD’s husbands, support them fully with love.