Did you know the difference between Luoz, Luos, Jeng’, Mjaluo, Jaluo and Mjaka?

Here’s the difference.

1. Luoz – are all over the world yaani diasporic, highly educated and articulate. I mean Obama type of people… They will die supporting Arsenal FC, Brazil , All Blacks, Harambee Stars and Gor Mahia.

2. Luos – are born and raised in Kisumu, probably went to Kisumu Boys/Girls High schools, then joined Maseno University or Kisumu Poly, work along Oginga Odinga Street in Kisumu and have never travelled past Ahero! They adore boda boda and Guinness.

3. Jeng’ – were probably born and raised in Nai (read Nairobi ), lived in Lang’ata or surrounding. Have been to shags once or twice for grandy’s funeral coz paros insisted. Says his/her shags is In upcountry somewhere in Nyanza. You say “amosi omera” to them and they respond “niaje jo vipi”. And they are only seen during Gor and FC matches at City Stadium.

4. Mjaluo – was born in Mombasa , speaks swahili sanifu, broken English and no mother tongue. Full names are Otieno Abdalla or Anyango Amina.. Is a Muslim, lives in Ganjoni or surrounding and thinks Kisumu people are “watu wa bara”.

5. Jaluo – Odhis ngima tek owada, we a bed e gweng’ ka!! OMERA!!!!

6. Wajaka – are born and raised in Eastlands predominantly Ololo, Okongo, Jeri, Salem , Bangla, Ofaro, Marish, Mbote, and Huruma. They have never gone past Ungem and they only know that they are Luos because of their second names. They know Kisumu is a town near Nakuru, where you pass ukiishiia kwa kina mbuyu..

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Odwako Fred